u n t i t l e d

It’s already 1.15am.There’s no one online to chat with me on MSN.He went offline early today.Must be really tired.

Went to see a doctor today to find out why are my lips always so dry.Waited for more than one hour also still haven’t reach my turn.Got tired and felt so sleepy cos I had running nose in the morning,so I told my mom that we should just go back another day.I don’t plan to.Ish.What kinda doctor comes at 11 when he’s supposed to come at 9,leaving his patients to wait for more than 2 hours??Haih,but he’s a good doctor la.Maybe got reason lo.I still like him a lot cos he used to give me Sugus sweets whenever I went there to get my injections when I was a kid.

Came home,ate lunch,wash plates,then sleep.Hmm,as much as I hate to admit this,I’ve been trying to sleep as much as I can whenever I’m bored so that I don’t think about him.It’s working well so far,all I’m afraid of is that I won’t be able to adjust my body clock back to the UniTime.Woke up at 4 to watch Full House,then went to MidValley with family.I bought a skirt!!!!!!!This might not mean a lot to most people,but it does to me.Cos whenever I go out shopping for clothings,9 out of 10 times I come home empty-handed -either I’m too picky or the clothes are too expensive,or they don’t look nice on me,or blablabla..but this skirt looked so nice(on me too)!!!!

I guess it’s time to sleep again.Not feeling sleepy at all.It’s raining pretty heavily now,and my kitchen started leaking,so had to go put some pails there and mop the floor.Dunno why rain so heavily also still so hot.Ish.I thought can sleep syok syok tonight.Going back to uni tomoro..haih..happy but sad..

I CAN DRIVE!!!!!I don’t know what made me think I couldn’t.But I can!!Muahaha…and I explored some places I wanted to.hehehe.So exciting.It’s fun-ner to drive at night.

Woke up early today to follow my mom to the market.Then helped her wash toilet.Then felt sleepy so fell asleep.After that woke up to eat lunch,then washed another toilet.Then went to Jaya to buy stuff,and saw this Factory Outlet shop there.New wan leh.There was a pair of Adidas shoes which were very nice!!Only RM84 wor!Mana tahu don’t have my size.AISEH!!!!!haih..what to do.Came home,watched Full House for an hour,then now feel sleepy again.NOOOOO!!How am I gonna stay awake in class when uni starts again?!Cham lo…

ok time for nap.goodevening.nightmares.

Today was a nice and simple day.Went to my aunts’ house after not seeing them since January.And as usual,my aunty asked me if I wanna eat ‘tong yuen’ (known as ‘yi’ in teochew) and of course, I said YES!!Kinda funny cos most people only eat tong yuen in December.But me,hahahaha I can eat tong yuen anytime.The ’soh yi’ (making yi) part was fun.There were pink yi’s,green yi’s,pink-green yi’s,white yi’s,pink-white,green-white,all in different shapes and sizes..hehehe.I purposely made some extra huge so I could chew them slowly,savour the taste.

After that,I went to Swensen’s with Karmun,Kahsim,Qianwen(ex-pendatang haram), and Shiawshiaw.Was so happy to see Shiaw cos I haven’t seen her since we graduated from Sri Aman.I can still remember how much the both of us cried on the last day of school.That was MAJOR.Hahaha..Anyway we all took lots of pics,and now only I know that KM,KS and QW are so so so good at posing for pics.It was so funny seeing them taking pics leh.I think today is the first time I pose for any pics..hahaha so hilarious ler.

Hmm I think that Hope is something very important to us.I don’t think anyone can live without hope.When you turn on the radio,you hope that they would play your favourite song.When you go out with friends,you hope to have fun.When your friends or family members travel outstation or wherever,you hope that they will reach home safely.When you love someone,you hope that he/she would love you back some day.Would you be able to carry on living if you knew that everytime your loved ones travelled,you’ll never see them again?And everytime you loved someone,it’ll never end up happily?That’d be terrible won’t it?

Sometimes Hope just seems to be so far away.But one thing for sure is that Hope is something which you can have if only you want to.Every bad thing that happens is just another bump in the road of life.After every bad thing,there’s bound to be a good thing.For what is a bump?A bump is a relatively higher portion of a smooth road.If your life is filled with bumps,won’t all the bumps then form a smooth surface?And if there aren’t so many bumps to make it a smooth surface,then you can look forward to the smooth part of the road.So all we have to do is to have hope,and tomorrow will be a better day.

Just got back from Genting today.Had loads of fun with my friends.We went for Corkscrew twice and I sat with QiGuang the second time.We were laughing and laughing and saying "BORING..BORING..BORING" all the while.Hahaha,we were such a nuisance.But seriously,we were bored the second time.Cyclone was better than Corkscrew in my opinion.

Then went for Space Shot.Hahahaha..QiGuang and I were counting how many seconds we would be stuck up there before we plunge back down while waiting for our turn.10 seconds.Being stuck up there for 10 seconds was bad.The weather is cold,you’re nervous,your fingers go numb.I started counting from 1 to 10 but stopped at around 4.I was petrified!!The plunging down was worse!!!I started shouting but ran out of breath or maybe I just couldn’t hear myself.I wanted to cry man.I will never ever ride that again.Couldn’t feel my feet after getting down.

Next was lunch.We had a GREAT view from where we sat.LOL.We were joking about how we could get back our money from Marrybrown.Sit on that spinning thing next to the restaurant and just vomit it all out.We’d be returning not only our lunch,but our breakfast as well.150% of what we got from them.

Anyway,we didn’t know what to do,since Corkscrew was already ‘boring’.So I suggested going for Pirate Train.Then QiGuang told me how it was for kids and how boring it was.I didn’t really believe him.He’s been to Genting SOOO many times that EVERYTHING is boring to him.So we went for it.I sat with CharngYang.We started shouting the minute we went in.Just for fun.Then it started getting really really dark and I was like "QG you’re so wrong".So CY and I waited for the ride to ’start’.We waited,and waited,and waited.THEN I believed QG.Then CY and I started commenting on how it’d be better if it weren’t that dark,cos we can’t see ANYTHING!How are we supposed to get scared if we’re half blind in there and we can’t see the stuff that’s supposed to frighten us??And the drawings in there were hideous.Bleah.

Dinner was fun.We had 3 eclipses.I don’t think I’ve ever talked so much in a single day.I lost my voice.Can you believe it.Then we gathered in Alvin’s room to play ‘Police catch thief’..or whatever it’s called.Then some went to bed and some of us who took too much glucose went for makan at a mamak,led by Chong.It was fun,walking in the middle of the night(around 2 am).Cool,peaceful,fresh air.Will never forget last night.

I dreamt about that person.In the dream,we were either really really close friends or we were together.I was confused in the dream.Guess you could say the same about real life.I only vaguely remember the dream.But I remember a girl from my secondary school who used to hate me a lot.Can’t say the feeling was mutual.I didn’t hate her.Anyway,the girl STILL hated me in the dream.And that person purposely sat really close to me to protect me from that girl.In real life,that would never happen.I don’t think so anyway.How I wish that dream was true.

I think there’s nothing more difficult than forcing yourself to stop loving someone.Knowing there’s no happy ending,yet not being able to forget the past.Trying to be strong but crying on the inside.

Holiday.A word which can make anyone smile.Something everyone looks forward to.I was looking forward to this holidays too.Until it started.The night my holidays started,I already felt bored.And no doubt about my friends too.None of them have been enjoying their holidays very much thus far.And me,I’m kinda rotting at home.

When I woke up at 7am this morning,I started to plan my day.

7.30:go jogging

9.00:eat breakfast

9.30:turn on computer,play The Sims

12:lunch

1:watch tv

6:go to pasar malam and eat pan mee

Just planning the day made me sleepy again and I fell asleep.Woke up at 8.30.Heard "Far Away" on radio.Went back to sleep.Woke up at 9.Went back to sleep.Woke up at 9.30.Couldn’t sleep anymore.Heard "Dontcha" by JJ and Rudi on Hitz.fm.Laughed.Felt bored.Tried to sleep again.Woke up at 10am.

Turned on computer.Sat in front of computer staring at the screen,wondering what to do.Went to read kennysia.com.Bored.Talked to friends.Bored.Talked to QiGuang.He suggested I blog.Interesting.Only problem is I seriously have nothing to blog about and I’m getting bored again.He left to have lunch.I’m not hungry yet.I feel sleepy.No no,must not be pig.Hmm,shall go pick an old DVD to watch.It’s terrible being home alone.Sighs….can’t wait to go to the picnic tomorrow.Muahahaha…KIDS

My Math teacher used to say "Confucious says, "When you are confused,just shut up"".LOL,of course that’s not true.It’s just according to her.I was confused this entire week about something,and at first I didn’t follow her advice and tried to ask questions and said some stuff which I don’t think I should have said to a person.Ended up feeling so so sad and hurt when I couldn’t understand.

But now I understand that what she said is true.No point asking so much and talking too much.If that person wants me to know,then that person will tell me.I’ll just patiently wait for that day to come.There’s nothing else I can do to help.Other than to stay by that person’s side while that person is facing a problem(if that person REALLY is facing problem).

Please don’t keep anything from me..trust me enough to tell me ok

I just woke up from a nap.I had a nightmare about a girl being hit by something very heavy on her head and she was bleeding.I had to help stop the bleeding.I can’t remember anymore except that that person was in my dream as well.

I sometimes have very very frightening nightmares.Last year,I kept having nightmares about car accidents.Over and over again,car accidents all the way.I was so so scared!Everytime I wake up from a nightmare,I have some difficulty breathing normally.

Sometimes I get so scared that I cry when I wake up.And most of the time I have someone to talk to ,to calm me down,tell me everything’s ok.Just now when I woke up,I realised I have no one to calm me down today.There’s no one to tell.

I can handle nightmares,but I hate it when it involves my loved ones.It’s as if nightmares are my worst enemies threatening me with my loved ones.

Sometimes,the best way to express yourself is through songs,when the feelings are just too strong to express with just mere words.I’ve been trying to look for a song which can warm my heart EVERY single time I listen to it,a song which I will never get tired of listening to,and then put it here to share with everyone.I’ve finally found that song.The first song which I am contented with just listening to,not singing along for fear I would spoil its beauty.And it’s title is "I Finally Found Someone" by Brian Adams and Barbra Streisand.

I Finally Found Someone

I finally found someone
That knocks me off my feet
I finally found the one
That makes me feel complete

It started over coffee
We started out as friends
It’s funny how from simple things
The best things begin

This time it’s different
It’s all because of you
It’s better then it’s ever been

‘Cause we can talk it through

My favorite line was
"Can I call you sometime"
It’s all you had to say
To take my breath away

This is it, oh, I finally found someone
Someone to share my life
I finally found the one
to be with every night
‘Cause whatever I do
It’s just got to be you
My life has just begun
I finally found someone

I didn’t mind
baby that’s fine

Just to know you were mine

Are you sure it looks right?
Isn’t it too tight?
I can’t wait for the rest of my life

This is it, oh I finally found someone
Someone to share my life
I finally found the one
To be with every night

‘Cause whatever I do
It’s just got to be you
My life has just begun
I finally found someone

And whatever I do
It’s just got to be you
My life has just begun
I finally found someone

It’s Semester 1 exam tomorrow.Maths.Mr Chow Chow.I’ve been feeling nervous since last week for Materials which is on Tuesday.I tried SO SO hard to concentrate,but I just can’t find ANYTHING about materials which interest me!!!Everytime I sit down to study materials,I just find something else which interests me more and I fall into temptation.Argh…anyway at least I know I’m a little bit more prepared for Math.

Mr Howard Barnes from England visited my church today.I met him for the first time last year at the Annual Conference which my church hosts every year at Cameron Highlands.He is this really wise man who makes me go WOW everytime he speaks.And today when he stood up to speak during the meeting,he reminded us about the importance of prayer.I guess many people forget how important it is to pray ESPECIALLY in times of need.

After he said those words,I realised that I don’t actually have to worry so much.I do my part,and the Lord will do His part for me.And I’m sure everything will work out for the best.That’s what faith is ,isn’t it?Believing without seeing.I believe that the Lord will pull me through again this time as how He has pulled me through SAM,through SPM,and through EVERYTHING I’ve been through in my life.

Time to study Materials.Hmmm,I think there’s a show on tv.Muahaha..